Do As I Do, Not As I Say
As a parent, I want the best for my kids. They are both adults now and one is married.
My son recently graduated from high school and isn’t sure what he wants to do next. He doesn’t want to go to college right now, so I asked him what he was most interested in.
Photography. He said he is interested in photography.
Naturally, his know-it-all dad came to attention and outlined a program for someone who wants to learn photography. It included:
- Online training from Lynda.com.
- Posting his photos to a daily blog.
- Keeping a daily journal of what he is learning each day.
Three simple things, right?
Self-Directed Learning – Week 1 Progress
The first week didn’t go so well. On Day 1, he and Lynda started off strong with a 2+ hour course on digital photography basics. Check.
Day 2? Distraction. Spend time with a friend. Go to a movie. And take pictures in the woods (yes, that does relate, and they were pretty good photos). But?
Day 3, 4 and 5 were not even hit and miss. They were all miss. No online training and no photos.
What did Dad do? Reminded him about keeping track of his daily progress, studying every day, etc., etc.
What was his response? He went to take a nap.
Do What I Do and Not What I Say
When our kids were quite young, my wife and I realized our actions spoke louder than our words. Our kids learned much more from what they saw than from what they heard.
It’s no different today, I thought. That’s when it hit me.
What am I learning right now? Am I sharing it with anyone? Am I teaching anyone what I am learning? Am I posting to a daily blog? Am I keeping a daily journal?
Answers: I am learning a lot right now (which is good), but I am not sharing it with anyone. And I am not keeping a daily blog or journal.
Question: Why should my son listen to anything I tell him to do if I am not willing to do the same thing? If I am not leading by example, why should he follow me?
He shouldn’t.
Share Something Small Every Day
That advice comes from Austin Kleon in Chapter 3 of his excellent book, Show Your Work! (a companion to Steal Like An Artist).
Kleon says to “Send out a daily dispatch.” His more detailed description is this: “Once a day, after you’ve done your day’s work, go back to your documentation and find one little piece of your process that you can share.” Clue: We should be documenting what we do every day.
That’s what I have not been doing. That ends today.
Even if my (big) kid chooses to ignore my advice, I can at least feel good about giving advice that I am personally applying in my own life.
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